Month: January 2014

Love yourself – it’s easier than it sounds

Part of this healthier me mission, has been me learning to love myself – as I am, right now.

One of the most helpful things I ever read is…

“You can love your body and try to change it at the same time”

But what does “loving yourself” really mean? Here are my 5 things (I found this online and look at it every day):

  1. Being able to forgive yourself. So you had a chocolate bar, you hit snooze instead of getting up to do your morning workout, you had too many wines the night before – forgive yourself and move on. Not forgiving yourself is this the harshest criticism, embrace your perfectly flawed self; it’s what makes the world so beautifully diverse and interesting.
  2. Understand your weight, hair colour, choice of clothing, how your stomach rolls when you slouch, or how you get a double chin when you’re laughing really hard, makes you any less attractive than anyone else. There is no set standard for beauty – and loving yourself means realising your own beauty for what it is and not in the context of how you look compared to anyone else (especially that chick in that magazine you were looking at before)
  3. That you have the choice to do what you love or continue living a life being submissive to the expectation put on you. Understand what makes your soul happy and continue to do it – as frequently as you can. Regardless of who judges you, or how much money you make, or whether you’re actually that good at it – if your soul is happy, than you keep doing what you’re doing.
  4. (this is my favourite) Not everyone will love you, and not everyone has to. If you are being true to yourself, and someone has a problem with that, then that is THEIR negative energy to deal with, not yours. You will never have the love, praise and approval of absolutely everybody, but that doesn’t reflect anything about who you are.
  5. Once you love yourself – you open the world up to love you to. How is anyone else going to know how absolutely awesome you are, if you don’t believe this yourself? Answer – they’re not. The greatest thing about loving yourself means is that once you do, you’re better equipped to let the world love you as well.

SO…what can you do??!! Print this out, stick it on your bathroom mirror and read it. Everyday. Trust me – it works.


I had my first session back at the gym today. And it didn’t go too well as I’m currently couch ridden with an icepack on my back. Fingers crossed it’s not serious.

The Girl Who Lifts.

Staying emotional

The last few days I have been doing some mega research – online, reading books, talking to friends, family – EVERYTHING. And I have come to this conclusion.

My weight loss mission is going to be SO MUCH MORE than just eating better and exercising more.

One of my new found idols is Dr Libby – and I feel I’m going to be referring to her a lot over the next 6months. I’ve started reading her book Accidentally Overweight and already I’m feeling better. “By exploring the physical mechanisms of your biochemistry and the emotional driving forces in your life, you will understand what has governed the growing and shrinking of your body up until now” YES – now I’m getting somewhere!

I decided to take it back to the basics. How I feel and What I eat.
As I’ve said before – I love to socialise and eat. I love to go out for a meal, or get some cheese and crackers and sit and eat with my friends. This makes me feel happy. When I’m sad – nothing comforts me more than junk food and a movie and when I’m stressed I’ll eat anything. This is where my problems lie. It’s got nothing to do with being hungry – It’s literally just because it feels damn good.

I have always been this way  – It’s a very terrible habit I’ve gotten into. My mum has done all she can to help me with my weight – helped me cook, paid for a dietician, researched, rewarded and comforted. But this needs to come from me and only me.

My mum and stepdad are visiting at the moment, and my mother (being a former fatty) has over the last few years fought her own battle with weight loss and has recently got down to a beautiful size 10. She looks amazing. She loves to walk so we went on a massive hill walk to the Seven Mile Beach lookout in Gerroa, and of course our discussions ended up with health. It was great. I’m so intrigued by people’s ideas and answers, and for the first time in my life – I think my Mum and I actually talked about my weight with no argument, and without me getting defensive. It was great.

I also had the best soul hugging chat with my soul sister back home this morning. She is one girl who will back me no matter what I do, her heart and soul support me, so her ideas are first on my list.

So – where too from now?

1. Food diary – but a little more intensive. When I eat, what I eat and how I feel. I’m excited.

2. Naturopath – see what answers they have

BOOM! I also love emails – so if anyone has any ideas – email them to me 🙂

The Girl Who Lifts


Seven Mile Beach

Emotional eating part 2

The last post kept me thinking for a while afterwards, so I thought I’d keep going with it.


While being on holiday this past week, I’ve really been able to let my body relax and have been able to take much greater notice on how my body reacts to food, and what is needed when.

The main thing I have noticed is that I get REALLY grumpy if I haven’t eaten… and then of course I’ll eat the first thing I can get my hands on. LUCKERLY I came prepared and have some meal replacement shakes on hand and my boyfriend will quickly make one of these up, otherwise I turn horrible.

Anyways, our holiday daily ritual has been like this

8am wake

8.30 coffee

9am exercise (the last few days my boyfriend has even joined me on this)

10am breakfast (yogurt, muesli, banana)


1.30 – 2pm lunch (left overs, or eggs)


6pm beers and nibbles (I’ve been naughty and have been eating potato chips)

9.30pm dinner (burgers, pasta, bbq chicken – my boyfriend is a chef so we have been eating well)

My body has LOVED this. I feel amazing…I even feel like I might be losing weight. Yes I am on holiday and I’m meant to…but I really feel like my body is at its best – and I’m going to try my hardest to keep this eating/mindset going. I really feel like I struggle to control my eating during the week, I’m not sure why, but I seem to need to eat so much more to keep going, even if it’s completely unnecessary. I’ll eat dinner on the train home, and then, just coz it’s there, I’ll eat dinner when I get home. If I’m tired and there’s food, I’ll eat it.

I also feel that my body has enjoyed being active. During the week I’m at my desk all day every day, so maybe I need to come up with ways to keep active during the day. Squat breaks every hour…or star jumps in the bathroom… SOMETHING to keep my body alive – as that’s when I think my eating stays on track.

A few things to keep thinking about that’s for sure…


The Girl Who Lifts.

Emotional eating

So I’ve been absolutely overwhelmed by support for this blog…I can’t really believe it. Many of you are loving the honesty behind this…so I’m gonna stick with it.

This morning I was woken by a message from a very old friend mine, I’ve known her since I was 5 tears old…so she knows me. She brought up the idea of emotional eating, and the emotional side of why I am the way I am. She suggested seeing a counsellor, to discuss my emotional habits which I am thoroughly thinking about.

I am emotional eater. I eat when I happy, I eat when I’m sad, I eat when I’m bored, excited, socialising, etc etc. I’ve never really thought about why though. I’ve seen counsellors before, and they have really really maybe this is a path I need to take to get me to where I need to be.

Whenever I read about weight loss stories it’s always “I woke up and decided to eat healthy and exercise and then I just lost weight”

Is it really that easy? So why has that not happened to me? This annoys the shit out of me..which I is why I want to look at every side of losing weight, coz surely it can’t be that easy for everyone. Stick with me and I’ll let you know.

P.S Today was exercise day so my boyfriend and I went out into the surf bodyboarding for about an hour. If you’ve ever waded through knee deep water in a strong current you will understand… It burns. I’m pretty sure it’s going to hurt tomorrow.

The Girl Who Lifts

Campsite workout

Today is day 2 of my holiday,  and as per my holiday goals, today was exercise day.  I had promised myself I would do it this morning, get it out of the way…so last night I prepared my workout gear – ready to get going in the morning.

A lot of people have asked me about my motivation for exercise – or where I find it. But let me tell you…this morning I played every mind game, and tried every excuse with myself not to do it. These included.. “I haven’t slept enough” “It’s too hot” “I’ll wake my boyfriend” but the best one “I’ll look stupid”

Now this last one played with me for ages. I lay there fighting myself..TRYING to find a reason not to do it. There are other people in this camp site…what would they think about some girl doing squats and lunges and running up and down the campsite?? But finally I remembered that NO excuse is better than the reason I’m doing this in the first place, so up I got (I didn’t wake my boyfriend) and exercise I did.

I set up a mini circuit – there was a concrete slap just next to us which was perfect for walking lunges and I mixed in some squats with my resistance band, jump squats, star jumps, abs and press up. I did this 5 times and I was spent. Proud and spent.

And do you know what? No one said a thing – no one even blinked an eye, except my boyfriend..who while he cooked me breakfast played Personal Trainer and told me to squat deeper.  My mind had tried, once again, to let me fail. Lesson learned. suck.


The Girl Who Lifts.

Thunder Thighs

Back in primary school, the boys in my class used to call me Thunder Thighs…this name has stuck with me and my thighs have always been a part of my body that I didn’t really like…until today.

Today I had my final session with Jake before my holiday and we smashed my legs.

Squats – my max set was 5 x110kgs (new PB)
Single leg press 4 sets of 8x80kgs
Bike sprints 4x30secs with a set of stairs in between

Today I love my Thunder Thighs.

Holiday Time

So I’m on holidays. 2.5 weeks off to do as I please… Starting Wednesday my boyfriend and I are heading up the east coast in a camper van for 10 days and I am going to put my heart and soul into not putting on weight while we are away. I think this will be a hard challenge.

I’ve set 5 holiday goals to help keep me on track:

  1. Keep up water intake
  2. Exercise at least every 2nd day. I’m taking a skipping rope and resistance band with me so I can set up circuits
  3. Don’t resort to takeways – PLAN
  4. Start each day with a healthy breakfast
  5. Limit alcohol

A holiday is NOT an excuse to eat whatever I want, and I have always struggled with this. I seem to convince myself that “I’ll just work it off after my holiday” This never works, so don’t put it on in the first place. Easier said than done.

Anyways, the weirdest thing happened to me at the gym before and it’s REALLY got me thinking… I jumped on the scales to get a pre-holiday weight (still 92kgs) and a girl, who looked about the same age as me, but about twice the size must’ve seen the unhappiness in my eyes said

“oh girl, I would kill to be your size”

This made me think… This girl’s “healthy” body image is where I am at, but I’m still working on mine. I need to lose about 15-20kgs to be in a weight range where I’m “healthy” – does that mean that she should loose double this? Or is she allowed to be happy and healthy when she gets to my size? Should I just be happy where I am at? Am I simply just doing this for my health…or will I be happier when I’m 20kgs lighter? Is it possible to love your body, but just wish it was 20kgs lighter?

SO MANY QUESTIONS. Hopefully I’ll find my answers…


The Girl Who Lifts.

Food frustration

So I went to the dietician today. We went through my food diary and talked about portions and then she said this…

“It looks pretty good to me”

What does that even mean?!! Obviously I’m doing something wrong otherwise I wouldn’t be in this situation. She must have picked up on my disbelief as she very quickly followed with…

“But there are some things you could change.”

Her suggestions: Have ½ cup of oats instead of a full cup and cut up some fruit in the evenings if I’m feeling like something sweet. Wow. That’s the best you’ve got? I’m sitting here, asking for your advice…and you tell me to cut up some fruit?

She finished up by telling me to “give it a go” and come back in 2-3 months.

So back to the doc I go to get another referral to another dietician for another opinion. I’m not going to stop until I get some answers.

After work I (luckily) had another session with Jake – 50kg bench press today. I’m still feeling pretty weak in my arms, and I feel it’s a real mental fight to push myself to failing point. Jake is amazing at getting me to my limit and tonight was one of those nights. We followed the bench with some incline dumbbell work, some overhead shoulder press and then a quick circuit (made up of kettlebell swings, skipping and abs) to finish off. Arms are def not my favourite thing to do, but I’m learning to love it.

I had a steak for dinner with my friend Rachael and caught the late train home. Again a perfect example of me using food to socialise, but it was the only chance I was going to see her…and it was a damn good steak.

The Girl Who Lifts

Leg Day

Today’s session with Jake was a killer.

Squats: 4 sets of 5-8 reps – starting at 60kgs and moving my way up to 90kgs (a new PB for me!!)

Single leg press: 3 sets of 8-10 reps at 80gs. Final set of 20reps at 70kgs

Walking lunges: 3 sets of 20 reps with 16kg dumbbells in each hand. We threw in some stair running in between to get my heart racing.

It’s days like today I get a sick satisfaction out of this. I do not know one girl who could squat 90kgs, and I did it. I get an interesting response from the guys – they are either extremely intimidated or extremely supportive. I like working out with the guys, I feel it pushes me to my max as I have this crazy determination to lift more than them.

I’m off to see a dietician tomorrow. I’ve been tracking my food pretty seriously over the past few days and I’m really interested in hearing what she has to say. From what I can see, I’m eating around 1500 calories a day. I eat my fruits and veg, and I include a good amount of protein. Food is a difficult one for me though – I love food, I love eating, I love socialising and eating, I especially love candy. I don’t eat terribly though…I don’t have take aways very often, I eat breakfast, lunch and a small dinner and I drink lots of water. So getting a scientific point of view is going to be very helpful.

I will let you know what is said

The girl who lifts.